I’ve been putting off writing this post, mainly because there is just so much to say. We left for the funeral on Tuesday morning, around 5, and got back Thursday morning around 10. The trip was a blessing for both Tessa and I on so many levels and I guess I don’t know which level to start talking about first. As the Mad Hatter said in the original Alice in Wonderland, “Start at the beginning! And, when you get to the end, stop!”
When we got to the airport the flight was delayed a full 2 hrs. Tessa and I just said ok and waited, in a tiny airport with only one gate, there’s really no way to fight the system. Once we landed in Tana we got a taxi, went to the supermarket to stock up on meat that we can’t get in Toliara, and went to the house of the missionaries that we were staying with. Now that last sentence makes it sound really easy, and it wasn’t exactly hard, but it was not the way I think you are imagining it. The cabs are holdovers from the 50’s and the streets are as full of people and cars as they can be. The traffic was especially bad this week because there is some sort of gas shortage going on and there were long lines out into the street at every gas station. At some point I will have to share with you all a detailed description of the skill of Malagasy drivers, but it will have to come later.
Once at the missionaries house we froze the meat and headed back out. We took a taxi-bus to meet up with some of Tessa’s friends and then took another taxi-bus outside the city to Mamy’s house. [Taxi-bus: 13 passenger van rigged to carry about 25+ people]
A quick description of a traditional Malagasy funeral. The body is laid out in the front room of the house with candles and flowers. Chairs are set up in the room in rows. The family sits on the front row and then any other close friends of the family fill in the chairs behind. All throughout the time from the death to the time of the funeral groups of people will come in to pay their respects. Each group will have one person who does the talking and then a very close friend of the family will respond for them, so that they never have to talk. The group will generally bring a gift of money, to help pay for the expense of the funeral and all of the guests during the wake. They will shake hands with the family and then leave. Then there is the wrapping of the body, the funeral, and the burial, but I’ll get to those later.
Tessa and I came in during this time and it was so good to see how much everyone appreciated her being there. She was among friends, people whom she had worked with and gone to church with and served with during her two years living in Tana. After she hugged and talked with the family we sat down and watched as the groups came in. Most of the people seated in the chairs would be staying the night and had probably stayed the night before as well. We decided to leave and come back in the morning. We got up the next day around 7 to take a taxi to where we would catch the taxi-bus again. When we got to the house we offered to help with the preparations for lunch or the cleaning up after breakfast but everything was all under control so we sat down and watched as a few more groups came in. Just before lunch time four older men came in. It was their job to wrap the body. The chairs were moved to make space and everyone stood around singing hymns while they wrapped Mamy in layer after layer of scarves. This was the hardest part of the whole thing for everyone I think, I know it was the saddest part for me to watch. Once she was wrapped and placed in the coffin we ate lunch, loaded into cars and buses, and went to the church for the actual funeral service. The church was packed. I couldn’t understand a word that was said but it was evident how many people loved Mamy and had been touched by her life. After the funeral we loaded back into the buses and went to the burial. Traditionally each Malagasy family will have a tomb and every deceased family member will be placed there. The tombs are like square mausoleums that then go way down into the ground like a cellar. Tombs are generally placed on the tops of hills so we rode the vans and buses as far up the hill as we could and the walked the rest of the way after the dirt road got too bad for driving. Since Tana is so high up in elevation and since it is actually fall here it got really cold as the sun set. We sang a few more hymns and then the body was placed into the tomb. Afterwards we walked through the receiving line and said goodbye to the family, Tessa said goodbye to her other friends that were there, we got back on the buses, and made our way back into town. When we got to our turnoff we got off the bus and, with the help of one of Tessa’s friends who understood the danger of two white girls walking around after dark, found a cab that we had called to meet us and went back to the missionaries' house.
I know that that long description seems very dry and factual, there was just so much information I guess I didn’t know what else to do with it. But there was ever so much more to it than I could ever really write about.
One of my biggest struggles coming here has been not being able to communicate. I know I said, gee, it’s gonna be really cool to learn how to communicate without words! But it’s actually really hard. I like being able to talk to whoever I want to whenever I want to and I can’t here. Something about the situation of the funeral kind of negated that. I felt welcomed by Tessa’s friends although it was a sad time there was an element of joy among the people I met, Malagasy people are really good at valuing fellowship. Also I just encountered more english speakers; the missionaries and many of the Malagasy people that I met. Each night at the missionaries house we would sit around eating dessert and talking and laughing, Tessa and I were always really tired so there was an element of delirium there. It was really a wonderful time of fellowship.
Also, Tana is a beautiful place, since it is in the hills the drives out of town to the family’s house, and especially out to the tomb, were beautiful! All in all, despite the sad occasion, it was really a great trip and I know that nothing in this post can do it justice, it was one of those things where the facts lend themselves to writing much more readily than the emotions.
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